Truth or Consequences

In times like these
Before you sneeze
The media goes looking
For gals and guys
Cuts victimize
And that’s who Maddow’s booking

Like average Joes

I’ve watched these shows
Those broadcast and those buffered
Awaiting scads
Of Moms and Dads
Who, all this week, have suffered

The long parades

Of teachers’ aides
Afraid of being furloughed
The countryscapes
Of rotting grapes
That never will be Merlot-ed

The crises feared

Have not appeared
I guess we must have licked ‘em
Except for prides
Of White House Guides
Am I the only victim?

My lips are blue

My tongue is too
My sinuses congested
And hungry bugs
Attacked my rugs
My base boards are infested

They’ve slowed the courts
They’ve starched my shorts
There’s no gas for my mower
And chances are
I won’t fly far
My sinkhole’s sinking lower

I like my fork

In roasted pork
If budget cuts get bigger
They’ll be no swine
I’ll have to dine
On Mr. Ed and Trigger

To paraphrase

Judge Stewart’s phrase
You’ll know one when you see one
I’ve never stood
For Victimhood
But I guess I must be one

My vision’s vague

I’ve caught the plague
My boils all are festering
My back is out
I’ve got the gout
All thanks to the sequestering
(by Tarzana Job)